Dr. Selekman created this idea for parents to use with their children to help start off conversations.  if gives you an idea of how yur child thinks.  You ask, "suppose all of you go home tonight and while you are alseep a miracle happens and your problem is solved. How will each of you be able to tell a miracle happened the next morning?" You get into the detials and make it real. Add their family cat that wakes someone up; ask what will be different (how people talk, look, etc.). Ask what changes have happened and how will others know just by looking at them that the miracle happened. Goal setting (Selekman, 1993; Selekman, 2002)